Dreams

Everyone has dreams.  I don't mean nighttime dreams, but the ones that we make.  Our hopes.  Our plans.  The stuff that fuels our passions and defines our goals. 

In American society, people are always saying that we can "grow up to be anything" that we want to be.  To some degree, that's very true.  If a person would like to be a crocodile wrestler, than they can (but I wouldn't recommend it, personally).  The truth is, that if a person has a dream, there most likely can be found the resources to accomplish it.

The question, then, is if we should.  I mean, just because I want something -- have always wanted it -- doesn't make it something that I should expend my life's energy accomplishing.  The dream doesn't have to be something inherently bad.  It could be a good thing, like getting married and having a family -- but does that mean that it is a goal that we should strive for with our lives?

It is difficult for me to see what God has planned for me.  I do not know the reality of how my life will play out.  I have ideals that I've dreamt about.  They are things I've always thought would happen.  And yet, what if it becomes clear that God wants something very different from me?

The thought of my dreams, scattered to the wind, left and broken, is not a happy prospect.  The scary reality that God might clearly show me that He wants the course of my life to take a different direction than I want, is not something that I would look forward to.

And yet He may call.  He might direct me differently, and that is when I will have a choice.  I will have to decide if I should still try to fight tooth and nail for the way I want things to be, or if I will let go of what I want and let my dreams dart away... released to the wind.

I need to take my dreams now, bringing them before my Lord.  I need to surrender unconditionally.  I need to understand that my plans will fall so short of the reality of His perfect plan.  I need to let Him have His way with me.  And, maybe, at the end of it all, my dreams will have crept back up and fallen back into place.  Maybe He had a place for them in His plan anyway.  Who knows?

And maybe what I'd wanted will disappear in the light of the One I gave them up for, and I won't care if I see them again...

   "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans."  Proverbs 16:3

-Aylin